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The Male Dictionary Vs The Female Dictionary

February 1, 2011 | 6 Comments » | Topics: Funny Pictures

men vs female

THINGY (thing-ee) n. 
For a female: Any part under a car’s hood. 
For a male: The strap fastener on a woman’s bra. 

VULNERABLE
(vul-ne-ra-bel) adj. 
Female: Fully opening up one’s self emotionally to another. 
Male: Playing football without a helmet. 

COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n. 
Female: The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one’s partner. 
Male: Scratching out a note before suddenly taking off for a weekend with the boys. 

BUTT (but) n. 
Female: The body part that every item of clothing manufactured makes “look bigger.” 
Male: what you slap when someone’s scored a touchdown, homerun, or goal. Also good for mooning. 

COMMITMENT
(ko-mit-ment) n. 
Female: A desire to get married and raise a family. 
Male: Not trying to pick up other women while out with one’s girlfriend. 

ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n. 
Female: A good movie, concert, play or book. 
Male: Anything that can be done while drinking. 

FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens) n. 
Female: An embarrassing by-product of digestion. 
Male: An endless source of entertainment, self-expression and male bonding. 

MAKING LOVE
(may-king luv) n. 
Female: The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve. 
Male: Call it whatever you want just as long as we end up in bed. 

REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-trohl) n. 
Female: A device for changing from one TV channel to another. 
Male: A device for scanning through all 75 channels every three minutes.

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6 Responses to “The Male Dictionary Vs The Female Dictionary”

  1. Adru Says:
    February 15th, 2011 at 11:47 am

    So, i’m a man now?

  2. Mike Says:
    February 22nd, 2011 at 8:38 am

    WOW I DIDN’T REALIZE MEN AND WOMEN WERE SO DIFFERENT!

    Men like to fart! Women have feelings! Beer! Sex! CRAZY!

  3. tiniestlibel Says:
    March 2nd, 2011 at 9:42 pm

    This is like some shitastic sitcom that dies in its infancy.

  4. Rob Says:
    March 3rd, 2011 at 9:44 am

    Ok so women think, have culter self control are ration and forward thinking, and men are just imature flatulent alcoholic sex fiends.

    Yep this article was definitely written by a woman.

    Remember guys, when you let women write all the definitions of right and wrong and who you are…you always lose

  5. Have An Affair Says:
    July 17th, 2011 at 4:50 am

    Yeah, I guess I have to agree with all the above.

  6. lucy Says:
    October 13th, 2013 at 9:14 am

    what a piece of bullshit writing

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