My job is so fucking unbelievable. I’ll try to sum it up by first telling you about the folks I work with: First, there is this supermodel wanna-be chick. Yeah, okay, she is pretty hot, but damn is she completely useless. The girl is constantly fixing her hair or putting on makeup. She is extremely [...]

Socialism You have 2 cows. You give one to your neighbor. Communism You have 2 cows. The State takes both and gives you some milk. Fascism You have 2 cows. The State takes both and sells you some milk. Nazism You have 2 cows. The State takes both and shoots you. Bureaucratism Vou have 2 [...]

This is how my Mom greeted me at the airport, after having not seen her for a few years. She made me walk through the entire airport under her left arm. (via)

Ninety percent of population is massed within 100 miles of northern American border. Seems not to mind that one of its provinces has turned almost entirely French. Excessive politeness only makes sense as cover for something truly sinister. But what? Citizens seem strangely impervious to cold. Decriminalization of marijuana and acceptance of gay marriage without [...]

Tonight I made meatloaf with garlic rosemary mashed. I told the kids we were having cupcakes for dinner. They were convinced all the way up till the first bite.  (via)