The Potterverse is full of fun fan fiction and interesting ideas. A recent discussion on Reddit has prompted a discussion on a super fun topic. Which Hogwarts House would Harry’s cousin, Dudley Dursley be sorted into?
For those who wish to argue that this is a moot point, as Dudley is a muggle and therefore would never be under the Sorting Hat, your objection is well noted. But this theory is still fun to think about and discuss. So, which House would it be? To answer that question, we need to consider each in turn and what their signature qualities are.
Gryffindor can be instantly ruled out. They are most famed for their bravery and adventurous spirit, two qualities that Dudley has never exhibited. Even the downside of Gryffindors, their recklessness and tendency to be stubborn, are not really seen in Dudley. Perhaps slight obstinance, but it does not seem to be a defining trait.
Likewise, Ravenclaw does not seem to fit him. Intelligence, wisdom, and creativity are the hallmarks of a Ravenclaw and Dudley has never shown any of these. While Ravenclaws do also have a tendency to be arrogant, judgemental, and ignorant, which Dudley does seem to be, he doesn’t match up with enough key traits to belong here.
Many may be tempted to place him directly into Slytherin, given he is seen as a quasi-villain, and that is the place most Potterheads associate with the bad guys. But Slytherins are not all bad. They are resourceful and ambitious, which are two qualities Dudley sorely lacks. They are also manipulative and cruel, and whilst Dudley does exhibit a capacity for cruelty when bullying Harry, he is not clever enough to be manipulative.
Which only leaves Hufflepuff. Hufflepuffs are loyal and trusting, which Dudley certainly is when it comes to his parents and friends. And it is sadly, to his detriment for most of his life, as they are nasty people who encourage his lazy and rude behavior.
As J. K. Rowling herself points out, Hufflepuffs remained in the Battle for Hogwarts because it was the right thing to do, as members of that house will always do the right thing eventually. While this may not sound like Dudley, remember that before departing with his parents towards the end of the story, he made a point of telling Harry that he did not feel he was a “waste of space” as his parents had called him so many times. The wild card trait here is humility, which Hufflepuffs have and Dudley does not.
So, no match is perfect for Dudley, but it looks like Hufflepuff is the closest. Perhaps if he had been magic-born and sorted there, he would have learned to be humble and ultimately become a better person. Certainly, fun to think about.