1. It’s 2022, just text ffs. There is no reason to call. Don’t even think about facetime!
2. I did absolutely nothing this weekend and it was everything I thought it could be.
3. I need a wall around the property too…and on a hill…with a moat…and alligators in the moat
4. I set my phone on silent and go over any missed calls at my convenience or never.
5. At some point I’m just going to pretend to call and say that no one answerered the phone
6. What if you are both??
7. When furiously pushing the close button paid off!
8. The feeling after being around people all day and coming home to silence is perfection
9. I legit enjoy hanging with friends but also I don’t
10. The transition is sharp. One moment you are hanging out and enjoying your small social circle, and suddenly you have this urge to just shut down everything and just sink into your bed. We are weird people.
11. I’m in this picture and I don’t like it.
12. I’m ready to leave when the idea has been made to even go.
13. This is a fact.
14. My battery never recharges further than the second to last picture. It has a small capacity.
15. One person is not better than the other. We are just built differently
16. Damnit brain, get it together!
17. I do all the work and you do all the talking. I think that’s a fair deal.
18. C’mon dude, wrap it up. I have a bed that requires my full, undivided attention.
19. Spends the rest of the time trying to think of an excuse to go home
20. Shhh, why do you have to be so loud and bring attention to us.